Words Matter, Tone Matters

“Language is the greatest motivating force. You can phrase something positively and inspire people to do their best, or negatively and make them feel worried, uncertain and self -conscious. I try to use my own voice in a way that shows caring, respect, appreciation and patience.” – Frances Hesselbein, former Girls Scouts CEO, founder Hesselbein Leadership Forum.

I’m a student of leadership.

I’m fascinated by the subject and believe that good leadership can solve nearly any problem, seize any opportunity and overcome any challenge.

Consequently, bad leadership (there’s an oxymoron for you) or lack of leadership can sink just about any ship regardless of how strong the hull.

When you achieve a position of leadership you quickly learn that words matter.

Unless of course you are lack emotional intelligence and either don’t care about how you communicate or don’t realize that your words carry extra weight. (We’ve all seen our share of those beauties).

Based on my study of effective leaders, the ones who use positive language to frame challenges and opportunities are usually the ones who get the best results.

Positivity is a strong motivator.

I’ve seen fear used as well.

Bullies will get short term results, but their “leadership” doesn’t sustain.

Leaders who show that they care, respect and appreciate those who they serve are special. They get results. They transform. We need more of them. A lot more of them.

I’ve worked with and seen organizations decimated by egotistical narcissists who think that people are there to serve them. They got it backwards and that mindset is crushing.

You can see the arc of destruction if you watch closely.

The bully/egomaniac is given a title and a little power and it goes to their head. They tend to put themselves on a perch and “sit above” the organization they are tasked to lead. Problems are never their fault, instead they seek to blame, point fingers and inject fear into the culture.

At this point, people with options resist and or leave and those who feel powerless stop taking risks or hide in hopes of outlasting the tyrant with the title.

What’s lost when this happens is incalculable—initiative, innovation, creativity, productivity and your organization’s desirability as a place to work or invest. It isn’t pretty.

What’s worse is the damage inflicted by bad leaders can have an outsize impact on the future of the enterprise.

Of course, this dynamic applies to cities as well.

When it comes to cities, there’s a term called “municipal math.” I believe the term was coined by Lyle Sumek, a consultant who works with Boca Raton and used to work with Delray Beach.

As Lyle explained to us—municipal math meant that it takes 10-20 years to build something of significance but only a year or two to wash away progress. It can take 10 years to get it back and there’s no guarantee that you will.

It’s a daunting equation and Lyle offered up it up as a cautionary tale. Feel free to innovate and lead, he urged us. But tread prudently, because at the end of the day you are a steward so don’t screw up what was handed to you.

So disrupt what doesn’t work, fix, create and put your stamp on your city, non-profit, business or industry but have some humility too. Your task as a leader to leave your organization better off than when you found it and in position for the next leader to take the enterprise even further.

Don’t act as if you’re the last monarch—you aren’t. In fact, don’t act like a monarch at all.

Serve.

Educate.

Lead.

And leave things better for the next generation.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dr. King: Lessons in Leadership

On Monday we celebrated the life and legacy of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

At the blog, we’re not quite ready to leave that day behind just yet. This year, it seems important to stick with Dr. King a little while longer.

 

For students of civil rights, leadership, non-violent resistance, communication and community building, the life of Dr. King offers a cascade of lessons.

 

On my personal quest to be a better leader I have looked often to King’s life, writings and speeches for inspiration and learning. What makes Dr. King such an enduring figure is that regardless of how often you read his speeches, letters and famous quotes you somehow come away with a new insight every time you delve into his work. He was an incredible man. And like all the greats– Lincoln, Jefferson, Washington, Roosevelt, Churchill—his message transcends time and offers us contemporary lessons and solutions if we care to look.

 

This year, I’ve concentrated on the leadership lessons we can learn from Dr. King’s life.

 

First, great leaders do not sugar-coat reality.

 

Indeed, regardless of how painful… great leaders tell the truth, even if the truth is dangerous, ugly, uncomfortable and messy. Dr. King laid bare during his lifetime this nation’s ongoing struggle with race and inequality. It would have been safer to go along to get along, but we wouldn’t be celebrating his legacy if he did.

 

Second, great leaders engage the heart as well as the mind. Dr. King’s gifts—his soaring rhetoric, the poetry of his writing, the beauty and power of his message–weren’t bogged down in statistics or dry facts, but enhanced by his magnificent abilities to move us as people and to point out how our fates are tied together as brothers and sisters.

 

King also taught us that great leaders do not accept the status quo and that they create a sense of urgency for positive change.

 

Again, lesser leaders might have been content to shoot for incremental gains in civil rights—not Dr. King. He framed the issue as an urgent one for our nation and as a result achieved monumental progress in what has proved to be an enduring struggle.

 

Dr. King refused to settle or buckle after setbacks, another leadership lesson we can learn from his example. Instead, he urged his followers to keep their eyes on the prize. He had a leader’s ability to communicate a clear vision for a better future and throughout the journey he always acknowledged the sacrifices and contributions of those working alongside him. He dared us, invited us, and taught us to dream—that’s what leaders do.

 

As a result, the movement wasn’t about one man’s vision; it was about a movement that was bigger than any one person.

 

And that’s why we celebrate and why Dr. King will be remembered as long as good men and women strive for a more perfect union.

 

The 8 Pillars of Trust

I recently read a book called the “The Trust Edge” which explains how you and your organization can earn trust.

Author David Horsager contends that a lack of trust is your biggest expense because it is the currency of business and life.

I agree.

Mr. Horsager defines trust as a confident belief in someone or something to do what is right, deliver what is promised, and to be the same every time in spite of circumstances.

Horsager identifies twelve barriers to trust: conflict of interest, threat of litigation, lack of loyalty, increasing examples of others untrustworthiness, threat of exposure, lack of control over technology, fear of the unknown, negative experiences, individualism, differences between people, desire for instant gratification, and a focus on the negative.

To overcome the barriers, Horsager offers eight “pillars of trust.”

The eight pillars all take time and there no quick fixes for any trust issue.

Here’s a deeper dive. We think you’ll find lots of wisdom in the list.

Clarity. Clarity starts with honesty. People trust the clear and distrust the vague. Communicate clearly and frequently.

Compassion. Think beyond yourself. There are four keys ways we show we care: listen, show appreciation, be engaged, and serve others.

Character. Have high morals and be consistent in your thoughts, words, and actions. Always ask, “Am I doing the right thing?”

Competency. Humility is the first step in learning. Create a regular plan for staying competent and capable.

Commitment. Great leadership demands sacrifice. The people who stick with you when things are tough are the ones you can really trust.

Connection. Trust is about relationships. In every interaction we increase or decrease trust. Be genuine, and be grateful.

Contribution. You must deliver results to be trusted. Give attention, resources, time, opportunity, and help.

Consistency. Probably the most important pillar of all as it gives meaning to all of the other pillars. You will never get one big chance to be trusted in your life; you will get thousands of small ones. Just one inconsistency can change people’s perspective.

We’d thought we share these pillars as a useful guide to your personal and business relationships. When elected officials, CEO’s, companies and governing bodies fall short–my guess is it’s because they are failing on one of more of the above pillars.

We believe that leaders given the public’s trust should abide by these pillars. All eight of them.

Do they?

Tails And Dogs And Nietzsche Too

Blazing interpretations

Blazing interpretations

“Tragedy is when I cut my finger,” said Mel Brooks. “Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die.”

“To err is human, to blame shows management potential”—Anonymous.

Ahh…perspective.

Was it Nietzsche who said there are no facts, only interpretations? It’s been 30 years since my philosophy class in college so I don’t remember much, but here is my interpretation of an important topic: City/CRA relations.

After nearly two years of trying to figure out what to do with the Delray CRA—arguably the most accomplished in the state—it seems that there might be a détente between the city and the agency.

By détente—I mean an uneasy peace. Because when one entity is all powerful and shows a fundamental gratitude gap it’s hard to rest easy if you are the weaker player. In this case, the big bad CRA– with all its money, awards, track record of achievement and vision– is far weaker than the city—even if the city is wheezing, which it is. (My interpretation).

I am not an unbiased observer of this drama. My wife ran the agency for many years and I have been a fan of the CRA since moving to Delray in the 80s. If you feel this disclosure disqualifies my opinion or interpretation—jump off here because I’d like to share some thoughts.

If I had to make a list of the things I like most about Delray—and I am passionate about this city—I would be hard pressed to name something that our CRA hasn’t at least touched. From our downtown and Old School Square to our library and our attractive streetscape the CRA has played an integral role in creating value and quality of life in our community.

So if you love Delray it makes sense that you would appreciate the role the CRA has played over the past 30 years in helping transform Delray from blighted to pretty special—not perfect but pretty damn good. Now I get that there are people who don’t like what happened here and their views are legitimate and understandable. But I would bet that most people like or even love Delray Beach.  Regardless, our CRA has been a big player in the city’s evolution for 30 years.

When he was first elected, Mayor Glickstein referred to the CRA as the “New York Yankees”—and as a Yankee fan I interpreted that as a compliment. After all, no franchise has won more World Series than the Bronx Bombers.

But to some, the Yankees are the Darth Vader of sports, the evil empire loaded with big bucks and an ability to land prized free agent talent with the stroke of a check. Maybe to some– the Delray CRA by virtue of its large budget and sizable impact –is seen as a threat or a competitor.

I have heard senior city staff and a few elected officials complain about all the money the CRA has and I even watched a comical/sad financial presentation that laid out a dire budget picture for the city, despite rising property values, healthy reserves, untapped revenue opportunities and a strong bond rating.

But of course, the clouds turn into a sunny day if (only) we didn’t have a CRA that sucked up all the money that could flow into the city’s coffers—because we all know how wisely and efficiently the city spends money (see consultants and outside attorneys). The city is certainly smarter and more efficient than the CRA right?

Well, not exactly. And that’s not on a knock on my city.

I love my city. I truly do. In fact, I love it enough to criticize it.

I think City Hall is struggling right now. And I think it has been struggling for a while.

It doesn’t bring me joy to write that sentence. But pretending that all is well doesn’t make it so.

That doesn’t mean that there aren’t outstanding people at all levels who work for our city—because there are and many of them have shared with me their frustration. I believe them. And I believe in them. Always have, always will.

It also doesn’t mean that everything is broken—because it’s not. But there are issues my friends. There is tension, instability, silos and a fundamental disconnect between the city and some key volunteer leadership in this town.

There are long time stakeholders and many newcomers who feel estranged from their city government. There are many who feel that there is a lack of alignment and true dialogue with key institutions, a lack of transparency surrounding some key decisions and perhaps different goals and visions.

I’m sure that sentence will rub some the wrong way. That’s Ok; I’m willing to state what others are whispering or talking about behind closed doors. We can pretend or we can be real. There is no currency in pretense but there is opportunity in candor. Opportunity to heal; opportunity to empathize, opportunity to compromise and find solutions.

Let’s stick with the example of the CRA for a little while longer.

Over the past two years the CRA spent money on consultants and studies to justify its existence—despite 30 years of accomplishment that should be plain for all to see.

  • A vibrant, nationally renowned downtown
  • A thriving Pineapple Grove district
  • Investment south of the avenue
  • More than $60 million invested on the West Atlantic Corridor and the northwest and southwest neighborhoods
  • A  beautified Federal Highway (landscaping needs to be looked at for better sightlines) but it looks and feels better.
  • A Community Land Trust and other housing initiatives that have upgraded neighborhoods and given families a decent place to live.
  • A beautified Northwest and Southwest 5th Avenue

Private investment ranging from Atlantic Grove and the Fairfield Inn to the proposed iPic and Uptown Delray projects.

And the list goes on and on and on.

Getting rid of the CRA or messing around with its boundaries would risk $6.5 to $7 million of county money that flows to Delray every year; funds that would go elsewhere if we didn’t have a CRA. We could have saved both time and money on consultants and studies if we had just understood that pretty basic fact.

Since its inception in 1985, just about every mayor and city commissioner viewed the CRA as a partner, a teammate. They saw the CRA’s success as a point of civic pride. They saw their money as another wallet in the same pair of pants. After all, the CRA doesn’t collect TIF monies and spend it in Boynton or Boca —nope they spend it in our city. Now, you may not like or agree with where or how the money was spent. But it wasn’t spent in a vacuum. It was spent in service to a vision, a citizen driven vision.

For most of its tenure, the CRA has worked to implement a plan—crafted by their board and in service to community driven plans adopted by the city. Therefore, the agency was considered a valuable tool—not a competitor starving the city for money and glory, but rather a partner and a trusted one at that.

But that somehow changed and that’s sad in more ways that I can enumerate. So I guess I am glad to see that CRA Director Jeff Costello and City Manager Don Cooper have figured out a way to pay for the CRA to pay for more city projects and expenses—just like they always have, maybe even more so going forward.

But I was puzzled when I read in the online Boca Magazine that the Manager felt that past spending was “piecemeal”—I’m not sure what that means exactly. But it intimates that maybe the CRA was just spending “willy nilly”—after all some synonyms for piecemeal are fragmented, spasmodic, disconnected and haphazard.

Maybe the manager misspoke because the spending was anything but. Now again,  you may not like what the money was spent on—the gateway feature, Old School Square, the Eagles Nest project with Atlantic High, Carolyn Holder Court (an affordable senior housing project) or the tennis tournament. But others liked those projects and most of them came out of community plans or public input; including the tennis tournament. The radical thinking was if you have a stadium you ought to put something in it.

Just because you weren’t around doesn’t mean the projects were piecemeal.

The same piece quoted the Mayor on the long term relationship between the City and CRA. Here’s what he reportedly said: “the CRA tail had been wagging the city dog. Now, the city is guiding the CRA.”

Guiding or dictating, I guess it’s all semantics or optics. Not sure which.

But I happen to disagree with the tail wagging analogy.

Since its inception the city and citizens have guided the CRA—but it’s been a partnership, a collaboration and a successful one at that.

As mentioned before, the CRA is a tool and has been used effectively to fund and implement citizen driven visions and plans. But it’s also been a quasi- independent agency—with smart board members who focus solely on redevelopment. As such, they sometimes have an independent idea and that’s usually a good thing.

The city can always object, call a foul or walk across the street and ask questions if they see something they don’t like or understand. It’s a relationship—relationships require communication and good relationships require agreement on goals and objectives. They also require mutual trust and respect. It’s also OK to disagree here and there.

This relationship –starting under Mayor Campbell –has worked pretty well. Take a look around, we’ve come a long way.

It’s been peaceful, not piece meal.

And wagging tails aside, it’s been a great tale indeed. At least that’s my interpretation.