Events and Things to Do in Delray Beach and Boca Raton

Boca Raton and Delray Beach are among the most vibrant communities you’ll ever find.

Both cities feature a vast array of events year-round that are sure to interest people of all ages and interests. From arts festivals and music events to a vibrant food scene and cultural landscape Boca-Delray has it all.

At YourDelrayBoca.com we strive to curate the best events and give you insider’s tips to make your experience the best it can be.

28 April, 2025 2 2 Comments

A Special Friend, A Special Man

April 28, 2025 By Jeff Perlman 2 Comments

Two great chiefs: Fire Chief Kerry Koen and retired Delray Police Chief Rick Overman.

A few more words about my friend, my teacher Kerry Koen.

Kerry’s funeral was last week at North Creek Presbyterian Church where he was involved for many years.

Kerry was a multi-faceted man. A gifted photographer whose photos of New England made me want to explore that region. He helped me discover a place called Woodstock, Vermont and we talked about the history of New England and its role as the cradle of our Democracy. Kerry was a talented chef, who went to culinary school and made wonderful chili.

He was well-read and had a deep appreciation for history. He would have been an amazing history professor or a wonderful photojournalist.

I spent the week reviewing the email he sent me over the years, each full of wisdom and useful information.

A few years ago, he gave me this quote from Einstein when we met for lunch at Ben’s Deli, a favorite spot of his. It resonated with me then and especially now, in the wake of loss.

“One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery each day. Never lose a holy curiosity. … Don’t stop to marvel.”

Kerry’s funeral service was a beautiful tribute to a great man. Honor Guards from Boca and Delray Fire Rescue were there along with a large contingent of former Delray and current and past Boca city officials. Kerry was proud to be a part of these municipal all-star teams. He was an MVP on those teams and his legacy will live on.
He took great pride in his public service. Boca City Manager George Brown did a wonderful job describing Kerry’s impact on Boca. I had the honor of speaking about his time in Delray and his impact on me and so many others. I thought I would reprint my remarks here for Kerry’s many friends and for the benefit of those who didn’t meet him but have benefited from his vision and stellar service. I will miss Kerry deeply.

Here are my remarks…

In Remembrance of Kerry Koen

We gather today to honor a great man. Kerry Koen was not just a fire chief – he was a builder of communities, a mentor to generations, and a friend whose love and wisdom touched countless lives.

The heaviness in our hearts today speaks to the profound impact Kerry had on each of us. Even though we knew this day was coming, the loss weighs heavy – because great men like Kerry leave spaces that cannot be filled.

Kerry served as Fire Chief for both Delray Beach and Boca Raton, but titles never captured the essence of who he was. At his core, Kerry was a teacher. He taught through his actions, his integrity, and his unwavering commitment to service. Every time someone in our community dials 911, they are benefiting from Kerry’s vision and contributions, though they may never know his name.

Kerry’s intellect was extraordinary. Many have said he was the smartest person they’d ever met when it came to understanding what makes cities work. He saw trends before others did. He thought deeply about challenges and offered solutions that were both pragmatic and visionary. He didn’t just see challenges – he saw possibilities. And he didn’t just raise questions, he rolled up his sleeves and got to work. Kerry Koen was a problem-solver. The best you could ever imagine.

He did all of this without seeking fanfare…and he never stopped serving his community. He never stopped mentoring those of us lucky enough to know him.

But what made Kerry truly special was how he balanced that sharp intellect with an equally powerful heart. He led with love – love for his country, love for his firefighters, love for his cities and especially love for his wife Lynne and his family. In these past few years, as he faced health challenges that would have broken most of us, that love only grew stronger and more evident.

There’s a message from the fire union that captures Kerry’s impact perfectly: “Chief Koen didn’t just lead Delray Beach Fire Rescue, he built it. He laid the foundation for the professional standards we stand on today and gave generations of firefighters the opportunity to wear this badge with pride.”

Indeed. Kerry Koen was an exceptional man and an exceptional public servant.

Kerry wasn’t interested in the small stuff. He wrestled with big ideas, and he inspired us to think… really think about our world and our role in the community.

Kerry wasn’t interested in personal praise. He was interested in making things better – better training, better equipment, better leadership, and a better future for those who answered the call. He gave a voice to firefighters and fought for their safety with unwavering determination.

In leadership, Kerry showed us what calm in a storm looks like. What humility means. What protection of a community requires. He made hard decisions without flinching and never hid when things got tough.

In friendship, Kerry was generous beyond measure. He shared books, articles, and photographs. He invested in people. He ended conversations with “I love you” – not a common sign-off for men of his generation, but Kerry had grown even softer and more sensitive as he aged, navigating his health challenges with remarkable grace.

Hours before he left this world, Kerry sat with friends at his bedside. I was one of those friends. He calmly told us he was dying. We shared stories, looked at memorabilia, and marveled at the breadth of his life. He was present with us the whole time – one last gift, one final lesson in life, service, and love. When we left, Kerry told us he would see us on the other side. He said I love you, one last time. We said we loved him too….

Kerry and I shared a special bond. I can’t quite put it into words, but what we shared was special. It was precious. Every time we spoke, and we spoke often, he taught me something. He showed me something I didn’t see. Every time…he was my great teacher and his influence on me and others can’t be quantified. He touched so many of us.

To Lynne, his beloved wife and partner on this journey – our hearts are with you, your daughter, grandson and son-in-law. What a team you two have been. How fortunate we are to know you and to love you. My friend Kerry never failed to tell me how lucky he was to have found Lynne; how he viewed her as a remarkable partner who helped him achieve his dreams in every aspect of life….

We throw the word “greatness” around too easily these days. But Kerry Koen was the real deal. He was truly great – not because of titles or achievements, but because of how deeply he cared, how wisely he led, and how generously he loved.

Some people come into our lives, and words simply cannot adequately describe their impact. Kerry was one of those rare souls.

The great ones leave their marks on our hearts and minds. If we are lucky, they arrive in our lives and communities, and if we are smart, we listen, learn, and appreciate them.

Many of us did just that with Kerry. We listened. We learned. And we are forever grateful.

As the fire union so perfectly said: “We’ve lost more than a former chief; we’ve lost a pillar of our department and community. But his legacy lives in every firehouse, in every crew, and in every firefighter who still strives to live up to the standard he set.”

Rest easy, Chief Koen. We’ll take it from here.

7 April, 2025 2 2 Comments

Seeds Build A Village

April 7, 2025 By Jeff Perlman 2 Comments

Frances and her crew. From left, Scott Porten, Elise Johnson Nail, Bill Branning, Frances, Joe Gillie and me.

Planting seeds.
Those were the two words I came away with after spending a weekend celebrating a special leader who changed Delray and a special couple whose passion and hard work has enabled all children to play baseball.
On Friday evening we joined about 170 people to honor the founder of Old School Square Frances Bourque with a scholarship named after her that will last forever.

We had a lovely dinner with friends, watched a short film that captured the origins of the cultural arts center and listened to speakers talk about what Frances meant to their lives.
Elise Johnson Nail, Scott Porten, Bill Branning and Joe Gillie spoke about how Frances’ passion for the arts and people brought them together in a common mission.
I also had an opportunity to speak and I thanked Frances for being a mentor, inspiration and muse.

I sat next another mentor of mine, former Mayor Tom Lynch who worked with Frances in the early days of Old School Square when Delray was still trying to jumpstart a moribund downtown and find its way.
Tom’s steadfast leadership and vision made him a natural ally of Frances as she and her team created a cultural center out of a once derelict building.
The word “center” in this case has more than one meaning.

Old School Square became the centerpiece of a civic revival, one that gained national attention.
As I surveyed the room, I saw the architects that made the revival possible. Two legendary directors of our Community Redevelopment Agency, a few former mayors and commissioners, key donors, talented staff (who were always overworked and underpaid) supportive city staff (now retired) and patrons who enjoyed decades of entertainment and programs.
The visuals filled my heart.

This is what a village looks like.

This is what it takes: good people, working together over a long period of time to move a community forward.
In this case, toxic politics pulled the plug on success. It’s a shame and I’ve written extensively about why the termination of Old School Square was a horrible and expensive mistake.
There’s no point in relitigating the issue, but there’s a point in celebrating the past, thanking people who deserve our gratitude and planning for the future.
That’s what the wonderful people of Old School Square are doing.
They are still hosting a popular “Six by Six” event which features local artists and raises funds for arts education. And now there is an endowed scholarship at the Conmunity Foundation to honor a civic heroine for the ages.
Well done.

Miracle League Founders Julia and Jeff Kadel.

On Saturday, we went to Opening Day at the Miracle League at Miller Field,
The Miracle League of Palm Beach County is celebrating its 20th season this year and that is something to cheer.
I had the honor of throwing out the first pitch. What a hoot!
20 years ago, I threw out the first pitch as Mayor. Our city commission had given league founders Jeff and Julia Kadel a $10,000 grant to seed the new league. 20 years later, I came back to see the fruits of that seed, and it was emotionally satisfying for everyone who attended.

We saw a parade of children, joining their teammates and coaches as they got ready for another season. We saw another civic heroine, Julia Kadel, run the show with love and passion. We saw sponsors and volunteers and players and parents and business people who stopped by to cheer the kids on. It filled my heart.

I was really happy to see our fire department represented. The men and women of Delray Fire Rescue have been volunteering and supporting the league since it’s inception. It has been a rough couple of years for our fire department, but from what I see and what I know we are absolutely blessed to have these brave people protecting and serving us.
That’s a good segue to tell you that our former fire chief Kerry Koen was honored with his own day in Boca Raton recently. Kerry was chief in both Delray and Boca. He was a remarkable chief, and he is a remarkable man.
I speak to Kerry few times a week and he always manages to teach me something.
On our last call, he told me about the honor and how much it meant to him. I was so pleased to hear that he was given the news by Mayor Scott Singer and City Manager George Brown, two terrific public servants.
Well done Boca.

Back in the village, Frances planted lots of seeds in Delray Beach that are blossoming everywhere you look. I see Old School Square alumni giving back everywhere. Volunteering for the Achievement Center, leading at the Chamber of Commerce, serving on the Business Development Board of Palm Beach County, giving their time their talent and their treasure to good causes throughout our community.

Julia and her wonderful husband Jeff Kadel planted seeds 20 years ago and this weekend we celebrated volunteers who have been with them for 10, 15 and 20 years. They planted seeds and those seeds have grown.
And my friend, Kerry Koen…well… he continues to mentor, teach, think and help behind the scenes to ensure that our community is well protected.
He planted seeds and those seeds became leaders who continue to serve.

On Tuesday, I will attend a luncheon with former Mayors hosted by our chamber. We are addressing the current class of Leadership, Delray. I am an alumni of the program. I know that current and future leaders are in that class.
The education the chamber provides serve as seeds. I can’t wait to see those seeds bloom.

Have a wonderful week.

3 March, 2025 6 6 Comments

The Art, Beauty & Importance of Philanthropy

March 3, 2025 By Jeff Perlman 6 Comments

A session at the recent Florida Philanthropic Network conference in Orlando.

We attended our first Florida Philanthropic Network conference recently in Orlando.

It was an enlightening experience.

Several hundred of the state’s top philanthropic leaders got together for three days of education, fellowship and networking.

As the executive director of a relatively new foundation, the Carl Angus DeSantis Foundation, I found the conference invaluable in terms of learning and meeting people with deep experience in the field.

I’m learning that there is a lot to the practice of philanthropy. There’s a lot of rules relative to giving, there’s also a lot of ways to measure impact, AI is beginning to influence the field and there is an emerging trend called venture philanthropy that’s fascinating.

When I tell people what I’m doing these days, they often say “wow, it must be fun to give money to good causes” and it is. It’s very gratifying but philanthropy is much more than writing checks to causes that touch your heart.

Yes, philanthropy is different from charity.

We don’t just write checks, although there is nothing wrong with that. As a philanthropy, we hope to make change.

As a result, we are making strategic investments in nonprofits that we believe can transform our areas of interest.

In our case, our “pillars” are health and nutrition, civic innovation, leadership and entrepreneurship and faith-based initiatives.

We created those areas of interest in concert with Mr. DeSantis to reflect his passions.

Our goal is to support people and organizations that have the potential to transform communities.

There is an art and science to the work we do. Philanthropy looks at data, financials and leadership capacity to determine whether it makes sense to make an investment.

Like venture capitalists and business investors, we seek a return on that investment in the form of change and results. But philanthropy exists to take risks as well. In fact, philanthropy takes risks and makes investments where others fear to tread. That’s what makes the sector so important. Philanthropy writes the checks that others won’t in order to invest in our collective future.

To date we have made 35 investments totaling $5.855 million. We’ve only just begun. Here’s a small sample of where we’re invested.

We are investing in entrepreneurs through 1909, a remarkable West Palm Beach based incubator/accelerator. We are giving our children a shot a future through nonprofits such as Bound for College, Take Stock in Children and the George Snow Scholarship Fund. We are partners with Her Second Chance giving women in recovery a new lease on life and we are proud of our work with 4Kids and the Achievement Center For Children and Families two organizations devoted to caring for children who need support.

We are working with the Mayo Clinic, FAU and Max Planck on research programs that we hope will uncover answers for Alzheimer’s and other brain disorders.

And there’s more.

We are by invitation only so we can be strategic and selective. But every investment we make has our founder’s ethos and spirit in mind. When I think back at how it all started for me, I just marvel at how fortunate I was to cross paths with such a remarkable man.

Twenty years ago, I walked across a ballroom at a charity event to introduce myself to Mr. DeSantis. We exchanged pleasantries for less than a minute and I didn’t hear from him for a few years until he asked to get together and talk about how I might help him with a new beverage he was excited about called Celsius.

Last week, that little brand Carl was talking about announced sales of over $1 billion. It all started in a small office on 4th Avenue in Delray Beach.

Carl was a believer back then. He saw the path, even when others thought we were crazy.

We were. But in Carl’s case there was genius, belief and courage too.

It paid off.

Last week, that little challenger brand which is now the number three energy drink in the land bought the number four brand Alani Nu for $1.8 billion.

Amazing. And somehow Mr. DeSantis knew. He knew.

Before he passed, Carl asked a colleague of mine and me to sit down and help him create a foundation that would give back to the community in perpetuity. We did. It’s the proudest work I’ve ever done. It not only brings me back full circle to community service it keeps me close to Carl and his terrific family.

I’m honored to do this work. Blessed too.

These thoughts ran through my head at the conference surrounded by people doing transformative work in a world that desperately needs healing.

I’m determined to learn as much as I can so we can make a difference knowing that somehow Carl is watching it all unfold.

13 January, 2025 3 3 Comments

A Wonderful Life

January 13, 2025 By Jeff Perlman 3 Comments

President Carter

Like many Americans, I didn’t think Jimmy Carter was a great president.
But also like many Americans, I think Jimmy Carter may have been our best former president.
President Carter, who passed recently at the age of 100, was a long term player. I like long term players. I think they hold great lessons for all of us.

When you reach a pinnacle, President, CEO, Governor or even mayor of a small town, it’s just that, a pinnacle. Not The Pinnacle. There’s always more for us to do. More for us to accomplish and aspire too.

Last week, I shared an article with friends that talked about old age.
The article noted that we cease being young when we stop aspiring, when we stop dreaming about the future.
It’s fine to be nostalgic and it’s important to learn from and reflect on the past, but we can’t live there. We have to keep moving forward. We can’t stop dreaming. There’s more for us to do. President Carter was a great example of that.

President Carter never got old.

He was only 56 when he lost his reelection bid to Ronald Reagan. He lived another 44 years. And it was a remarkable 44 years filled with building homes, global diplomacy, writing, teaching and of course romancing his beloved wife Rosalynn.

My friend Scott was one of President Carter’s students at Emory. He speaks glowingly about President Carter and tells a remarkable story about running into him years later while on a trip to Greece. The president remembered his name.
Now, Scott is a memorable character but that’s impressive.

A week before President Carter’s death, I happened to listen to a podcast featuring the historian Kai Bird.
Bird recently wrote a book about Carter which sounds fascinating.
He believes that Jimmy Carter may have been the smartest man to occupy the Oval Office. He talked about President Carter’s rise from Plains, Georgia to leader of the free world with stops first in the Navy, the Georgia Senate and Governor’s mansion.
It’s a remarkable story. An only in America saga. We still produce those stories and that’s comforting.

Jimmy Carter was our first rock and roll president befriending the Allman Brothers, Willie Nelson and Kris Kristofferson.
That’s a cool tidbit, but the important takeaway of his life, is that he turned a bitter and decisive defeat into a triumphant second chapter.
He was a long term contributor and he never stopped serving his country and people in need.
Personally, I don’t understand leaders who fade away.
How can you care so much about a cause or a place or a business and then just disappear?
Now admittedly there’s a fine line.

You don’t want to be the quarterback hanging around the high school parking lot talking about glory days. And the you don’t want to be the micromanager lurking in the shadows pulling the strings.
But you can be the veteran presence providing support and advice when needed and when asked. You can advise and find other ways to serve when the spotlight shifts to someone else. And folks, the spotlight always shifts to someone else.

Jimmy Carter never stopped serving or caring. You may disagree with his politics but it’s hard to argue with his commitment.
We need more servant leaders. We need more people who care to stay engaged for the long run.
Remembering a Chief
Delray lost another contributor recently with the passing of former fire chief Bob Rehr.
Chief Rehr was a good man and I enjoyed working with him briefly after I was elected to the City Commission in 2000.
He had a long and distinguished career in the fire service. He spent 24 years with the Miami Fire Department and served as Fire Chief in West Palm Beach. All told, he spent 37 years in the fire service.
He will be missed. We send our condolences to Chief Rehr’s family during this difficult time.

23 December, 2024 2 2 Comments

Putting the Civil in Service

December 23, 2024 By Jeff Perlman 2 Comments

Admiral Stavridis.

Recently , a friend and I went to the Forum Club in West Palm Beach to see a speech by Admiral James Stravidis, the former Supreme Allied Commander of NATO.

It’s cool to be able to see a global figure in your own backyard. The Forum Club of the Palm Beaches provides these opportunities regularly. It’s special and I’ve resolved to take advantage and learn.

Admiral Stravidis has had a remarkable career. After his celebrated service in the Navy, he ran the Fletcher School of Law and Diplomacy at Tufts University and now serves as vice chair of the celebrated Carlyle Group, a major player in private equity.

He’s an impressive man. A serious man who has spent a career wrestling with some of the world’s most vexing problems: war, terrorism, national security and competition from China and Russia.

We enjoyed hearing his perspectives on NATO, Ukraine, Taiwan and our own military capabilities. Stravidis recently published a historical fiction book in which he tells the story of great admirals—Halsey, Nimitz–and how they defeated the Japanese in the Pacific, keeping the world safe from fascism. It was inspiring to hear the stories, especially from someone who has seen combat during his own era.

I came away with two thoughts after hearing the Admiral’s presentation.

First, we need people of this caliber running for national office. Serious people, experienced people, those who have seen the world as it is and therefore can steer a safe and productive course for the United States.

Every question posed to Admiral Stravidis was handled with depth, clear thinking and a solid rationale. It was impressive.

Second, he said something that has stuck with me because it’s true and it’s lacking today.

As a retired Naval officer, Admiral Stravidis is often thanked for his service. He said men and women in uniform appreciate the words “thank you for your service” but he urged us to expand our gratitude to others who serve us.

Teachers, police officers, firefighters, nurses and those who work for local, state and the federal government are among those who deserve our thanks. He included volunteers and those who serve in public office in his list of those who would benefit from those five words: thank you for your service.

It won’t cost us anything, but it will yield us benefits that cannot be calculated.

We have become a cynical and snarky bunch. And if I am honest, I can be that way too.

Truth is there are some people who don’t deserve our thanks, they deserve a trip to the woodshed but there are far more people who quietly serve us well. They should be thanked and respected.

Often, they are disparaged, disrespected and disregarded. Doing so is ruinous.

We can do better. We must.

Thank you for listening and have a Merry Christmas and a Happy Hanukkah.

16 December, 2024 0 Comments

A Lifetime of Achievement

December 16, 2024 By Jeff Perlman Leave a Comment

Yvonne Odom: A living legend

I’m fascinated by long term contributors.

I’m talking about the people in our civic universe who put their noses to the grindstone and work over long periods of time on the things that matter.

We often take these people for granted and seldom stop to recognize their achievements and impact.

We live in a fast-paced, complex and disposable world. We accumulate and then we discard. We are busy, but often not intentional.

Life can be overwhelming, especially this time of year.

So, when I saw that my friend Yvonne Odom was given a “Lifetime Achievement” award from Omega Psi Phi, I was thrilled. Mrs. Odom deserves recognition. She’s a remarkable person.

Omega Psi Phi Fraternity is the first international fraternal organization founded on the campus of a historically black college. That founding happened in November 1911 on the campus of Howard University in Washington D.C.

The motto of the organization is “friendship is essential to the soul.” And indeed, it is.

The words scholarship, perseverance and uplift are used to outline Omega Psi’s principles and when I think of Mrs. Odom those are the words that come to mind.

For those who don’t know, Yvonne Odom integrated Seacrest High School in 1961, becoming the first African American to attend the school that would become Atlantic High.

Mrs. Odom was chosen because of her strength, grit and resilience; traits that she exhibited as a teen and throughout her storied life. She was 15 and the only Black student at the time.

But while she made civil rights and educational history that day in ’61, she was just getting started.

Mrs. Odom became a teacher in 1967 and worked in Palm Beach County for 45 years touching countless lives. But when she retired from the classroom, she never stopped teaching others.

We became acquainted when I worked for the local newspaper and stayed in contact through my tenure as an elected official and beyond. If you were a smart local official, you listened when Mrs. Odom spoke. Her lessons are always tinged with insight and historical perspective.

Too often, public officials lose sight that they are public servants, there to serve the public. The best ones realize they have lots to learn from people like Mrs. Odom.

She’s always been generous with her time and opinions, and I think she would have made a fine elected official herself. A few years back, she tried to fill an interim position, but thanks to political dysfunction the commission deadlocked on how to fill an open seat, and we lost out on that opportunity. It was our loss.

But Ms. Odom just kept doing what she does. Speaking out, leading and supporting those making a difference in our community.

A lifetime achievement award honors just that— a lifetime of achievement. It is not a one-off accomplishment and it’s here that Mrs. Odom shines. She remains involved. She speaks out, she mentors, she advises, she’s engaged.

It’s the long-term contributors who move the needle in communities big and small. They don’t do it for recognition, but it sure is nice when their body of work is honored.

The communities that say thank you, the communities that “see” people, the communities that honor and respect those who give their time to others are the ones that succeed. They are the communities that are built to last.

A Milestone birthday…

Speaking of long term contributors.

We attended a birthday celebration for a close friend last week at the wonderful La Cigale restaurant.

Jim Chard is a long-term contributor. He’s got energy to burn and is involved in a raft of good causes: reef health, education, entrepreneurship and making sure our tree canopy is growing and healthy. There’s more. He’s a true community servant. I admire him.

These are the people who make good things happen. Leadership is synonymous with caring and Jim cares. Those who know him look forward to what’s next on his agenda. And there’s always something next.

Passings…

Vald Svekis, the entrepreneur behind the iconic Liberties Fine Books & Music, passed away recently. He was 83.

Mr. Svekis opened Liberties in Mizner Park in 1991, and the bookstore became a big draw for several years. He sold the business in 1994.

During its run Liberties became famous for hosting famous authors including former President Jimmy Carter, former VP Dan Quayle, famed rock photographer Lynn Goldsmith and Dr. Brian Weiss, best selling author of “Many Lives, Many Masters.”

Liberties became known as one of the country’s premier independent bookstores.

According to his obituary, “Svekis’s brilliantly zany marketing ideas brought renown. Dan Quayle’s appearance was promoted with campaign signs sprinkled around town; Gloria Steinem was greeted by a window display celebrating suffragettes and featuring her as the statue of Liberty; Madonna’s “Sex” could only be viewed in a “peep booth” for $1 a minute with all money going to AIDs Research. Liberties was sold in 1994, allowing Vald and Sherry (his wife) to retire to Sarasota.”

For those of us who love books, Liberties was a magnet. The store is still missed by those who experienced its magic.

25 November, 2024 14 14 Comments

The Greatest Gift

November 25, 2024 By Jeff Perlman 14 Comments

Orlando Reunion 2024.

Thanksgiving thoughts…

Aside from family, I find myself most thankful for friends.

I’m just back from Orlando where I met a half dozen friends for a reunion weekend. All but one of us turned 60 this year, the lone exception being Dave who is 59 and skipped a grade.

We don’t hold his youthful inexperience against him.

I’ve known Scott, Dewey, Ben, Howie, Joe and Dave for 50 plus years. We were boys when we met. We’ve gone through every stage of our lives together.

It’s been 40 plus years since we last saw each other daily. We live far away from one another in places like California, Wisconsin, North Carolina, New York and the great state of New Jersey.

There have been marriages and kids, career changes, triumphs and losses. We’ve seen a lot together and apart.

When I looked around the dinner table where we gathered to share wine and stories, I thought of all the places we’ve been, all the things we’ve accomplished, who we’ve become and how we got here.

Combined we have traveled the world, been awarded patents, started, bought and sold businesses, raised kids, stared down bullies and took some crazy risks and luckily lived to share some cautionary tales. We have a great many stories…we are each other’s memories able to fill in gaps that otherwise would be lost to so many days gone by.

Favorite teachers, girlfriends who broke our hearts, dreams we chased, music we enjoyed, bars we frequented, parents and friends we’ve lost.

These days we are talking about off-ramps. When and if we can retire, how we worry about our children’s futures, how much we love them and how different they are from us at a similar age.

We’ve been getting together for these reunions for a while now. But this one felt different, more settled, more joyful and more appreciative. We know how special this is, we know how fragile too.

Most of the time our affection for each other has gone unsaid. We are guys after all. But this time we acknowledged how meaningful these friendships have been. This time we talked about how much we are thankful for this brotherhood we share. We are each other’s collective memories, we have each other’s backs, these are the men we can call in the middle of the night and know they would be on the next flight out.

Yes, these are my brothers. We will be there for each other until the end.

There’s comfort in that thought.

So much of life is impermanent. It’s a fast-paced world. It’s nice to know that at least one thing won’t change—our friendship. And when we leave this world, that won’t change either.

We managed to stay in touch through the years, but our friendship got tighter during the pandemic when Dave organized bi-weekly “Zoom happy hours” that continue today.

The early calls focused on the glory days and whatever happened to so and so, but eventually it morphed into discussions of current events, politics, sports, careers and family.

When I see these guys, I can still see the boys I met in 1970s Long Island. But I also see the men they’ve become and when I listen to them opine on the great issues of our time, I feel a sense of pride.

These are intelligent and thoughtful men. These are good people. I’m proud of them— in so many ways.

And then someone will tell a gross joke and for a moment I’m 16 again excited about my rusty old Mustang, hanging out with my buddies in Ben’s kitchen sharing New York style pizza and thinking about the next good time. The road and the possibilities seemed endless in those days. It was all ahead of us….

I’m fortunate, I’ve made lots of friends over the years. I’m in touch with college buddies and met them for dinner a few months back on Atlantic Avenue. I kept up with a few old work colleagues and made lots of friends in and around Delray.

I love them all.

I’ve also lost a few friends over the years and drifted from others too. It happens, I suppose. But I’ve been lucky in this part of my life. I’m thankful for special people.

I know there’s a crisis of loneliness in America. The Surgeon General has labeled loneliness a public health issue.

There’s a lack of community these days. I’ve seen the change in Delray, which used to be a more social place.

But I don’t think we’re an anomaly.

These days we are lost in our phones, struggling to make ends meet, caring for our children and our parents, hustling to keep our heads above water.

It can be exhausting. But we find renewal in friendship. We are energized by the intimacy and the closeness of our best relationships.

So, I’m grateful for these moments with friends. The calls, the texts, the infrequent in-person reunions, the occasional meetups over lunch at Papas Tapas, Granger’s and Wood & Fire. This is what makes us rich.

This holiday season I hope you’ll connect with friends and family.

Maybe seek out an old buddy or two.

As I think about this last reunion, I have a few parting thoughts.

First, I cherished every moment of our time together. I felt present, not distracted.

We are getting older, we’ve had a few close calls, we’ve all lost parents, a few siblings and people we went to school with.

We are thankful for what we have. (Even the sophomoric insults have charm when you’re not sure when you will see each other next).

When we were kids, my buddy Scott and I talked endlessly about the future.

One time, or maybe more, I put on an old Simon & Garfunkel album that featured the song “Old Friends.”

The song imagines two old pals sitting on a park bench.

Old friends sitting on a park bench like bookends, their memories brushing the same years.

They note how strange it is to be 70.

I told Scott when we were teenagers that someday that would be the two of us. We would meet on that proverbial park bench and reminisce.

We are a decade away.

It’s getting closer and closer.

That notion once seemed so far away, but now it’s almost here. I can see the bench.

And I’m thankful that we may just get there—together. All of us.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving.

18 November, 2024 7 7 Comments

The Magic of Planting Trees

November 18, 2024 By Jeff Perlman 7 Comments

Community Greening at a recent tree giveaway.

I’ve been fascinated by Community Greening for a long time now.

I drive by one of their projects on Lake Ida Road every day. The trees they planted brighten up what was once a bleak stretch of asphalt.

Community Greening is a Delray Beach based nonprofit that has a simple but profound mission: plant trees, build community.

The organization engages and educates the community about the benefits of those trees and in some food insecure neighborhoods—and we have them— they plant fruit trees that become a source of nutrition for residents.

It’s an elegant model that serves an important need. Most cities in our area suffer from an insufficient tree canopy. The U.S. Forest Service recommends a canopy that covers 30-40 percent of the area, Palm Beach County has about a 20 percent canopy.

The lack of a robust canopy creates “heat islands” that impact the environment. In some cases, temperatures can be 10 degrees higher if the canopy is insufficient.

Enter Community Greening. In its 8-year existence, the nonprofit has planted some 18,000 trees.

But the organization is also about strengthening a community’s roots.

Community Greening is a convener.

Volunteers gather to plant the trees and that’s when the magic happens. People of all ages work together to build a healthier and more aesthetically pleasing community.

The Carl Angus DeSantis Foundation is proud to partner with Community Greening. We recently granted the organization $50,000 which will be used to support Community Greening’s nursery operations and to help build a classroom at the nursery that can be used for meetings and education.

Community Greening’s mission spoke to our desire to build community.

We also like that the group collaborates with local organizations such as the EJS Project by giving young leaders an opportunity to volunteer and to learn.

Sometimes it’s these simple acts that make a profound difference.

If that sounds hokey– so be it.

We live in crazy times. We’re awash in division, we bathe in lies and I’m afraid that we’ve grown numb to it all.

In a noisy world, we long for signal. We need to seek clarity, we must create and strive to nurture beauty.

And sometimes you find that clarity in simple acts of community.

Gathering as neighbors.

Planting trees.

Educating people.

These acts speak to us.

Our communities need conveners and leaders such as Community Greening.

They believe that by engaging volunteers and like-minded community partners that they can improve our environment, create more sustainable neighborhoods and strengthen society.

That last sentence comes from their website: www.communitygreening.org.

I invite you to check it out, get involved and support these local leaders. On a personal note, I am deeply impressed by the quiet leadership of co-founder and Executive Director Mark Cassini and Community’s Greening’s Operations Director Adriene Tynes. Co-founder Emeritus Matt Shipley is a special leader as well.

We are thrilled to do our part to support this special group.

28 October, 2024 6 6 Comments

Conscience & Catalysts

October 28, 2024 By Jeff Perlman 6 Comments

Margaret Chase Smith and Joe McCarthy as portrayed on the Portland Stage.

I saw a play in Portland Maine recently, and I can’t stop thinking about it.

The best art is like that. It won’t leave you alone.

“Conscience” by Joe DiPietro tells the story of the battle between Maine Senator Margaret Chase Smith and the notorious Senator Joe McCarthy.

It’s a riveting history. But it’s also sadly relevant today.

“Conscience” shows us how a brave Senator– the first woman to serve in both the House and the Senate– stood up to a demagogue who gleefully ruined lives through disinformation, lies and bullying.

Back then it was the fear of communism. Today you can take your pick of things used to whip up fear and emotion.

Predictably, politicians in the McCarthy era valued their careers over their country and the truth. They despised McCarthy but they wouldn’t stand up to him for fear of losing their seats.

This is how real and lasting damage occurs. When we look the other way, when we wait for others to do something or when we give our assent through our silence or just as bad join in and spread more lies.

Injury occurs when we support those who exhibit abhorrent behavior.

Margaret Chase Smith did none of those things. She spoke truth to power. Her conscience wouldn’t let her be silent.

I learned a lot about our history and our present during those two hours at the Portland Stage, a gorgeous old theater with a rich history of producing landmark works.

Sitting in the dark I got swept up in the drama marveling at the performances, the story, the brilliant writing. There is nothing like live theatre.

And when the show ended, all we wanted to do was talk about what we had just seen and how it relates to the world we live in today.

It’s a dreadful time in America. It really is. So much anxiety. So much vitriol. So many lies and half-truths. So much hatred. You can feel it in the air. You can taste it and it’s bitter. We are no longer united and it feels awful.

According to a recent poll cited by the Aspen Institute, 58 percent of Americans believe our best years are behind us.

That’s a staggering and depressing statistic because America has always been focused on and excited about the future. A future we were leading with optimism.

Both parties embraced the future: “It’s morning in America.” “Hope and Change.”

Now we “lead” with words like “vermin” and “unhinged.”

We’ve lost faith in our institutions. We’ve lost faith in each other.

We lack leaders and as a result we are at risk of wrecking a remarkable country.

Both sides of the divide don’t agree on much these days, but we seem to agree that we are broken, polarized and at risk.

The author Frank Bruni calls it a crisis of confidence—a disease of pessimism in a country built on optimism. Bruni calls it a “violent rupture of our national psyche.”

Indeed.

Which is why “Conscience” the play resonates so deeply. We long to see our leaders stand for something.

Watching Margaret Chase Smith take on Joe McCarthy was gratifying.

Every bully has it coming. Every bully is driven by fear. And every bully will take your lunch money until you stand your ground and say no more.

Those that stand up to bullies pay a price. Their noses get bloodied, but their causes are noble and at the end of the day history treats them kindly. That should matter.

Nobody remembers the sycophants. Nobody.

But they remember those who stand up for what’s right. We remember those whose conscience drives them to do the right thing. We call it character. We call it integrity. We long for these heroes. They make all the difference.

Nobody remembers the sycophants. Nobody.

We do however remember the monsters—they should serve as cautionary tales not to be repeated. And we remember the heroes and heroines—those who stand for something. Those who lead with love and courage.

Those with conscience.

Catalysts

The Carl Angus DeSantis Foundation honored two community heroes last week at a luncheon at the wonderful Farmer’s Table in Boca Raton.

We officially presented the “Catalyst Award” to Ted Hoskinson of Roots and Wings and Julia Kadel of the Miracle League. The award is in honor of our late founder.

Mr. DeSantis was a catalyst. He made good things happen and he led with generosity and courage.

The award is loosely modeled on the MacArthur Foundation “genius grant.” Like that award, you can’t apply for our prize, your work speaks for itself. Foundation staff and the board honor two people a year with a no-strings cash award and a luncheon celebrating their achievements. We also gather the two dozen organizations we are supporting to honor their work in our community.

It’s a fun and meaningful afternoon. We’ve seen our grantees walk out with new friends and collaborators and it gives us great pleasure to see these relationships form. We have a great community, and we have great people who devote their lives to helping others.

In my view, these are the real leaders in our world. Running a nonprofit is infinitely harder than running a business. I’ve been involved with both and while business is tough and complex, nonprofit work is loaded with complications and nuance. But the best nonprofits lead with love. They make miracles happen.

So, when you gather these special people together it’s magical. You can feel the power in the room, and you can’t help but be moved by the compassion they have for others.

We support organizations that are swinging for the fences.

We do this because that’s what our founder Mr. DeSantis did.

When I got involved in his world in 2008, our world was falling apart. The financial crisis was threatening to sink the economy. I had no idea that Carl would be the force he would become in my life. But when he recruited me to help with a beverage company he had discovered—a small but promising brand named Celsius—he exuded optimism about the future. He made all of us in his universe believe that we could conquer the world and slay the giants who were around every corner waiting to smack us down.

I found an email Carl sent me from back then; when I decided to listen to my heart and take a chance on this guy.

“I’m not in this for Cracker Jack prizes,” he wrote about Celsius. “This is going to be big.”

And years later—after all sorts of adversity—it was.

Carl believed. Always.

That’s what we look for in our Catalyst Award winners and our nonprofit partners.

There’s Mark Sauer—a retired executive who ran MLB and NHL teams—who “retired” to Delray Beach and decided to change the lives of impoverished children through Bound for College.

There’s Erin Hogan who runs Her Second Chance in Boca Raton, giving women in recovery the chance to learn skills and rebuild their lives.

We just welcomed Lynne Kunins and the magnificent team at FLIPANY to our Foundation family.

FLIPANY feeds thousands of nutritious meals to kids and seniors at scores of sites throughout South Florida while teaching them about health, fitness and how to cook healthy. Lynne is a social entrepreneur who overcame addiction, poverty, hunger and attempted suicide with physical fitness and nutrition. She’s an inspiration. A community builder. She’s been doing this for 20 years and she wants to take this nationwide. I have no doubt she will.

The night after our Catalyst Lunch, we went to the Kravis Center for a FLIPANY event called “Chef’s Up Front.” Talented chefs from throughout our region gathered to raise funds for FLIPANY’s many programs. It was heartening to see the love and passion in the room. Food and nutrition connect us as people.

When we visited two sites to see FLIPANY serve nutritious meals to hungry and poor children, many of them from immigrant communities, I was struck by the beauty of this simple act. There are people who villainize others and there are those who love others. Most of us walk by and pretend that we don’t see what’s right in front of our eyes–that’s a violent act too in so many ways. I know which group I want to belong to. I know which group I want to help.

Which brings me to this year’s Catalysts.

Julia Kadel and Ted Hoskinson are personal heroes of mine and many others. For 20 years Julia and her husband Jeff and their army of volunteers have built community by enabling children of all abilities to play our national pastime. My goodness, baseball is a beautiful game. They call their effort the Miracle League and indeed it is a miracle. The love they have for community is miraculous and powerful.

Ted’s Roots and Wings honors teachers and helps children become good readers. Ted and his team are changing lives. If you can’t read, you can’t succeed. Ted’s mission is to leave no child behind. It’s a beautiful way to spend a life.

I can go on. And I will because our Foundation has only just begun.

I invite you to join us. I write this hoping that you will find a way to help heal a broken world. Please transcend the ugliness of the present moment by getting involved in activities that build a better future.

Unity over division, love over hate, generosity over greed, truth over lies. Light not darkness.

Julia Kadel is a 2024 Carl Angus DeSantis Foundation Catalyst Award winner.

Ted Hoskinson 2024 Catalyst Award Winner.

14 October, 2024 10 10 Comments

The Magic of Theater, The Magic of Trying

October 14, 2024 By Jeff Perlman 10 Comments

A few months back, I wrote about a New Play Festival sponsored by the wonderful Delray Beach Playhouse.

I’ve been a writer longer than I can remember, but I’ve never written a play. I have two screenplays sitting in a drawer, but writing for the stage is not something that I ever had the nerve to try. Until now.

Last year, I wrote a short play entitled “The Cafe on Main”, and answered a call for submissions for the New Play Festival. My short work was one of 10 chosen, a surprising but wonderful development that has literally changed my life.

I cannot express the joy that I feel hearing my words acted out by talented actors who breathe life into the characters and find nuances in the play that I never knew existed.

The Cafe on Main is a place where love is given a second and sometimes third chance, says the description in the playbill.

The action takes place in an imaginary cafe in my hometown of Stony Brook, NY.

Stony Brook is kind of a magical place and growing up on the north shore of Long Island in the 70s and early 80s was an idyllic experience for me and most of my friends.

Stony Brook was a village, intimate and cozy, but close enough to New York City that we benefited from the energy and opportunities of the Big Apple.

Now 1970s NYC was a little different. There was crime and grime, graffiti and garbage. We had the Son of Sam, the Bronx was literally burning and my hero John Lennon was gunned down outside the Dakota building.

But we had Thurman Munson and Reggie Jackson, the Knicks, Rangers, Big East basketball, Tom Seaver and Joe Namath too.

It was all a short ride away on the Long Island Railroad.

But home was quiet and safe. It was pretty and suburban. But far. from boring. My hometown has a rich history going back to the Revolutionary War. Washington really did sleep here..so did his Setauket spies.

All of these images went through my mind when I sat down with an empty page and imagined a quaint, cozy Café overlooking the Village Green in picturesque Stony Brook.

Truth be told, my home for the last 37 years also was on my mind. The proprietor of my imaginary cafe was modeled—loosely—on my dear friend Fran Marincola, owner of Caffe Luna Rosa a Delray institution. If you know Fran, and most around these parts do, you understand that he’s a rich character. I had plenty of material to mine.

The New Play Festival features short plays and my original version of “Cafe” is a full blown production. To qualify, I had to cut characters and with the help of our magnificent director Marianne Regan, we pared down the back story of the proprietor.

Someday, I will tell his story in full.

We cast the five parts in July and I was floored by the talent that came to read for the 10 plays.

The directors ask the playwrights to draw up their wish list and I was thrilled when I landed my top picks for four of the five roles.

The wildcard was a young actress whom I liked but didn’t list as a top choice. Turns out she had to drop out and the role was recast with Diane Tyminski, an amazing actress of local note who happens to be from Long Island.

At rehearsals, she blew us away with her grasp of the character and the milieu.

Ahh rehearsals..this is where my life changed where I caught the theater bug and happily succumbed to the bliss of live theater.

The cast, Sergio Fuenzalida , Diane, Shelly Pittleman, Nancy Ferraro and Peter Salzer are extraordinary.

There was an immediate palpable bond among them and the chemistry was off the charts.

Watching them run the scenes and find the characters was not only fascinating it was moving.

There’s nothing like hearing your words come to life. It’s simply intoxicating.

Admittedly, I don’t have a frame of reference. It’s my first play. But I also saw the cast with tears in their eyes. They were as swept away as I was.

Honestly, I couldn’t believe it. But it was real and so I asked what they were feeling and they shared.

Going into rehearsals I was concerned that the actors wouldn’t connect with the material.

Was it good enough to engage them?

Now I was concerned that the initial emotion would be lost with more run throughs.

This is where the director comes in.

I had heard that Marianne Regan was good. Now I was seeing just how good she was. She knew what buttons to push, how to make the story move and she also knew not to over rehearse our talented cast.

And so the magic they captured was intact.

Leaving the theater after rehearsals I felt buoyant. I felt like you do when you discover a new love—excited, eager to share with my wife and friends and far less nervous for opening day. (The Festival is October 19-20 at 2 pm, my play runs Sunday. For tickets visit delrayplayhouse.org, they are expected to sell out).

Of course, I’m still a little nervous but I sure have confidence in this cast and director. I’m in good hands.

I don’t want this feeling to end.

Writing can be a lonely endeavor. It’s just you and the empty page sometimes joined by an inner critic, a chorus of doubt and these characters you imagine and try mightily to bring to life.

But this is the payoff. The chance to collaborate with talented people. The opportunity to share with an audience longing to be taken someplace different.

I realize how rare this is. How lucky I am. And I am grateful.

What a magnificent gift this historic old playhouse on Lake Ida gives to 10 writers a year. The actors too. There is so much talent waiting to be seen.

We are all enriched when there’s an outlet. It’s a noisy, often chaotic world. Monster hurricanes, divisive politics, so much coming at us at once and all the time.

To step into a theater and watch actors bring a story to life is a valuable gift.

I hope you will make it a point to visit and support the Delray Playhouse. It’s a charming place. A gem. And I hope you’ll try something new like I did. You never know where it might lead.

You never know if trying will better your life. It has mine.